A Little Trip to the Bakery

Last week I went to the bakery to grab a hot sausage roll and a sweet treat. I was hungry and this bakery is the best in Northampton. No I’m not telling you my secret just yet, find your own delicious bakery. I parked up and coincidentally another car had parked at the same time and their occupant walked off down the road. I followed said occupant as the smell of baked goods was in the same direction. It was a nice day and I hummed along to a tune in my head as I caught up with the person in front. It’s a narrow path with cars parked all over it and there wasn’t room to pass so I patiently followed at the pace set for me. It’s only now as I think about it that I possibly should not have followed so close as the person in front was a young lady.

With the news of the whole life order handed to the killer of Sarah Everard and the new case of the alleged murder of Sabina Nessa, the issues of how men are perceived in certain situations has come up again. And it is a ‘male’ problem, not female. Those men who think; ‘well it’s not all men’ or ‘I’ve never hurt anyone’ can stick their heads in the sand, but quite frankly fuck them. If you can’t work out that you might be a good guy, but the person who you’re walking towards on a dark, rainy night with poor street lighting can’t possibly know that, then you need to take your head out of your arse. Of course it’s not all fucking men… BUT IT IS MEN. What do you expect them to do? Ask for your good guy credentials? Realise that it is on all of us to ensure that everyone feels safe.

And now a Met Police spokesperson has said that if you’re approached by a ‘plain clothes police officer’ by themselves, then you need to call for help, or flag down a bus. ‘O excuse me potential attacker whilst I grab myself an Uber.’ Fuck them and fuck that. I’ve never heard such insensitive bullshit in my life. How about working on the causes of this violence and eradicating it at source. And how about not asking those who are being attacked to sort the problem themselves. So here’s some handy hints that I think we can all live by and I have definitely stolen these from loads of other people:

• Don’t put drugs in other people’s drinks.
• If you come across someone who is drunk or alone, for shit’s sakes, don’t assault them.
• When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them the fuck alone.
• Partner up with a mate; if you think you might sexually assault or murder someone, your mate can stop you.
• If you’re in an enclosed space with someone else remember! It’s important not to attack them.
• Carry a whistle. If you think you might rape someone, blow the whistle hard until someone comes and stops you.

All dark jokes aside. Work out what you can do to help. The Lovely Girlfriend and I had a conversation and one depressing conclusion we came to was that even though this was being highlighted in this moment, nothing really would change. But I suppose we can only control ourselves and so I will be making more of an effort to be less intimidating when out and about whether I think I am or not. And I hope to almighty Thor that I did not worry the young lady that I just happened to be following the other day. And honestly, I’m just fucking fed up of my girlfriend telling me she’s worried to go places where I would not hesitate to go. She is being denied things because of this fear and it has to stop.