What I’m about to write has been discussed by a lot by other folks cleverer than I. There’s a book on it, that I’ve not read and on doing some research on the interwebs, the quotation has been attributed to many people. But I think it’s something that I’m pretty good at saying and meaning and so could offer up some help and a little confidence boost to those who are maybe not so comfortable saying what I’m about to write.
No.
Is a complete sentence.
No.
Is a complete sentence. It doesn’t require justification or explanation.
Now I will say that adding ‘thank you’ after the ‘no’ is possibly a polite addendum to what may sometimes be heard as a rude response. And when speaking to loved ones, I recommend this or you might get a slap up the bracket. However the power of saying no is great and wide. When you say ‘maybe’ in answer to someone, when what you mean is no, it gives that other person an avenue to cajole you into doing something you don’t want to do. They’ll wear you down and you’ll relent.
I’ve done it. I’ve put friendly pressure on friends and family when they give me an opening, to get them to say yes. It’s mainly when I’m plugging a show that is in need of audience numbers, when they’ve got no interest in theatre or watching me prance about making a fool of myself. But bless them, they’re trying to be polite and so they say yes. And they come, don’t really enjoy it, waste some money and have to lie to my face after about how brilliant they thought it was.
And I know that feeling when you’ve said yes to something and you’re not dreading it per se, but you really can’t be bothered and you internally berate yourself because you should have just said no. It’s there, but I do have the knack for saying no more often than not. It’s liberating. I sometimes feel that my time is under constant pressure to fit everything in, not only my responsibilities for work but the things that I like to do outside of work as well. And so saying no to things that I don’t want to do makes me feel less stressed and takes the pressure off.
And there’s something else that’s important as well that goes hand in hand with saying no. Saying no, in the full knowledge you’re not busy. Saying no to something you don’t want to do, even though you don’t have anything else to do, but that time is set aside for relaxing. And there are times when saying no should come across as maybe not rude, but stern. Saying no with some steel behind it. Our society has consent issues and sometimes saying no takes courage. And I admire those people who have to say no in difficult circumstances, but they do it anyway because that is right for them. Set those boundaries, be polite when appropriate and say no.
To finish:
No. is a complete sentence. It doesn’t require justification or explanation.
No.
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