So the last ‘Update’ post I wrote was in August 2022. As I’m sure you’ve just realised, that’s like a whole year ago. A lot has gone on in this last year, so I thought it was time to bring them back for a little update. I believe this is the sixth ‘Update’ post I’ve written and you should definitely know they are like filler posts, when I’ve got about four things I want to write about but not enough to fulfil a full post. A little peak behind the curtain there.
First and foremost, we lost the Football World Cup Final 1-0 to Spain. From my untalented vantage point, Spain were the better team on the day. We played hard and had to put up with a little bit of time wasting and play acting on Spain’s part, but they simply outclassed us. It was a huge shame, as I’d been watching every game that we played and we seemed to be reaching a high point just at the right time, but it was not to be. Immensely proud of the Lionesses though.
My player of the match was Mary Earps, England’s goalkeeper, seen above just after saving a penalty against Spain. She has been renamed Mary Queen of Stops after winning the Golden Glove (best keeper in a tournament) at the Euros last year and the World Cup this year. Although the reaction above may look uncouth, I know how it feels to pull off what seems like an undoable feat whilst playing sport and keep your team in the game and the ensuing adrenaline rush you experience. Good times.
Onto recent political news because as you know, I like to have a whinge. Our government seemed to think that this summer we needed a week of briefing on one subject or another. Recently we had small boats week. Brilliant. The dungeon barge, the Bibby Stockholm, which is meant to house asylum seekers that arrive in England via small boats, saw it’s first victims on the Monday. The contract for three barges and accommodation for asylum seekers was for £1.6 billion over two years and was given to a company without tender and with links to former Prime Minster, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. Again brilliant.
On the Thursday it was reported that the thirty human beings who had been transferred to this barge were evacuated because Legionella was found onboard. Just so we’re all aware the contract should not have been signed before a Legionella check had taken place, but we signed it anyway and the barge is now potentially useless as it’s apparently difficult to get Legionella out of the system once it takes hold. Well done everyone. Sadly on the Friday of small boats week, a small boat capsized attempting to cross the channel and at least six people drowned. And our evil Home Secretary who delights in performative cruelty to asylum seekers had the gall to tweet (yes I know it’s X now, but fuck Elon Musk) that her ‘thoughts and prayers are with those affected.’ Honestly, Sue-Ellen Braverman can scroll up on this post and let Mary Earps tell her where to go. And when she gets there, she can keep fucking off, maybe to Ascension Island (Google it, another shit idea from the Home Office during small boats week.) The sooner she is away from any form of political power the better.
And just for those at the back that were not listening the first time I wrote this, the way to deal with the humanitarian crisis that is human beings risking their lives in small boats crossing the channel; is by putting money into processing claims quicker, putting money into policing the criminal gangs who facilitate these crossings and creating safe and legal routes for people so they don’t need to use small boats in the first place. It’s not easy or cheap, but it’s a damn sight better than wasting the money we are now for absolutely nothing in return.
And third and finally, I have started rehearsing my next show, Things I Know to be True, at Harborough Theatre for Market Harborough Drama Society. Back once again, being directed by the lovely Hazel Cook, Chairperson of Harborough Theatre no less (I have to curtsey whenever I’m in her presence.) I play Ben, the third child out of four of Bob and Fran. This emotionally charged play spans a year in the life of the Price family and their travails. Rehearsals have only just started and we go up in November. In the meantime, you can always click on the button below to find out more info on this play or for tickets to MHDS’s next performance in September, a spoof of The Hound of the Baskervilles, tickets on general sale on Tuesday 29 August at 9:30am. Apparently it’s fucking hilarious.
… shit I said there’d be four things didn’t I. I was ill recently. Poor me. I’m fine now.
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