These tempting little bastards that only get sold between Christmas and Easter. They seduce me. Their shiny yellow packaging draws me in. I can see the packets in my brain now and my brain is tricking me into tasting them in my mouth where none actually are. They’re so good, I want them, I need them, the little chocolate fuckers. The outer shell so crunchy, the inner so chocolatey. MINI EGGS!
Ok, so I’m not that crazy for mini eggs that I can taste them just by thinking about their packaging, but they are bloody good. You have to put them in the fridge though or they’re just not as good. And yes, all chocolate should live in the fridge. I know, I know, they say chocolate loses some of its taste if it’s colder than room temperature, but check this. Put the mini eggs in the fridge, then once appropriately cooled, pop one in your mouth, hold! Don’t bite down and munch away like a barbarian. Delicately use your teeth to break the shell off, munch on that, hold the egg of chocolate that’s left. Once the shell has gone, suck on the chocolatey egg until it melts in your mouth. There’s your flavour. Boom!
Sadly, this is literally how I eat mine. How do you eat yours? They’re so good though. In two ways I’m glad that they’re not sold all year round. My bank balance enjoys it and so does my waist line. It is also odd to me that in our current world where you can get whatever you want (within the law and reason) with a couple of clicks, that a company retains the decision to only sell them from Christmas to Easter. Hold on whilst I do some research. And I’ll tell you why, because I just took some time out to google it. It’s simple, you’ve guessed it… money. Cadbury found that if they sell mini eggs all year round, they actually sell less over the year, rather than them being seasonally available. It makes them seem like a special treat just for that time of year. Humans are weird. We buy more because they’re only on sale for like three and a half months than we would if they were available all year round.
They are just a perfect little treat. Get one of the little bags which are now more than £1.50. I remember when they used to cost blah blah blah. I don’t give a shit how much they were, I want them in my face now. One of those little bags for a night in is perfect. It’s like the good people of Cadbury know what they’re doing when they decide on how big a bag should be. Something fishy there. And that my little chickadees is four hundred and ninety two words on mini eggs. Now do one and reward yourself by eating your Easter chocolate, whatever it may be.
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